Month: October 2022

A light arose in his eyes as he finally ticked the last box to confirm the diagnosis. “You have Myasthenia Gravis!” It was clearly some sort of victory for my neurologist – a notch on his cane, a feather in his cap or something. 

He happily went on sharing that Aristotle Onassis also had it and how very rare this disease was. I was not sure how I was supposed to process this – was I the lucky winner of a very rare disease that placed me in the exclusive company of a very wealthy man whom I never met and had no interest in? 

He did say that there was no medical cure and that it was degenerative and that no-one had ever been healed from it, didn’t he? Doesn’t seem like such a great privilege.

Well, although the symptoms are very similar, I was grateful that it was not Multiple Sclerosis – better the devil you don’t know in this case.

The doctor continued to educate me. The reason why my facial muscles became dysfunctional at various times was because the muscle-nerve connections were being attacked by some other crazy cells and thus, my muscles did not receive the messages from my brain to move. It typically starts in the face and then spreads to the heart and lunges and that is where the “Gravis” part of the name comes from because its end is the grave. 

Where does this disease come from? Most causes are still unknown but lucky for me, my disease was caused by the only one known to medical science at the time, which is, an enlarged Thymus gland.

Who ever heard of a Thymus gland? Not me but I learned that it is a little gland that is logged right in the center of all the vital organs. It produces antibodies to help the tonsils protect the body against disease. After it has completed its task in a baby, this gland normally shrinks and in most adults it is hardly even visible. But in some cases, like mine, it gets enlarged and the antibodies attack the nerve-muscle connections.

Maybe that is why the doctor was so excited? One can only hope!

So if it gets removed, we’ll be good and life can carry on, right?

Not exactly. 

My doctor explained to me that all the operation can do is to prevent more damage to new areas but that the existing symptoms will stay and can even become much worse. Secondly, I would need to be on the medication, Mestinon, for the rest of my life and thirdly, I should not have any more babies because the baby has a high risk of contracting the disease and there is no telling how bad it will be for the child.

I can live with that, I thought.

The operation was booked at the Olivedale Hospital in Randburg, South Africa over Passover of 1998. Here is some context:

 My Jewish husband and I had recently come to faith in Jesus, the Messiah of Israel. Our second son, David, was born just before the symptoms started. 

Our firstborn, Yonathan, was a toddler. We found ourselves in a financial crisis because of a combination of events outside of our control – one of which was a result of us having to close our little toy business because of my illness. We could not pay the mortgage and yet we managed to stay in our house for a whole year before the bank foreclosed. We were very hard workers but suddenly our work was unprofitable. We lived on coins that fell between the couch cushions and charity here and there from our precious but poor little church community. We were scraping by but we felt the love of our Father in heaven. He certainly had our attention because WE DID NOT UNDERSTAND!

Nothing that we had tried worked. Eventually, we would get up every morning, read the book of Job and pray and cry.

We cried because we had two little boys to feed. 

We cried because our own efforts did not work. 

We cried because we did not know how our future would look but we rejoiced because we knew that God had it all.

We had peace. We were surrounded by beautiful Christian brothers and sisters who undergirded us. And we knew that although our earthly future was uncertain, our eternal future is secure forever! What a joy!

Two weeks before my operation, we went for a weekend to my parents’ home in Pretoria. I was putting Yonathan to sleep. This was my favourite time of the day because l loved to cuddle my kids until they fell asleep. Yoni was in dreamland and I was enjoying the rare quiet moment when nobody needs me when I heard these words: “Tonight you are going to be healed” – inaudible voice. Well, I thought, here I am! Ready! 

But nothing happened. 

We went to bed later that same night and in the small hours of the night I became aware of a presence next to my bed. I was sleeping on my side. Hands moved over my body from my feet up to my head, not touching me at all but as the hands passed I felt a warmth in the area under the hands. I knew it was my Lord and I started praising Him! There was no fear, just joy!

I told my husband that I had been healed and we were so excited. We called up the surgeon the next day and told him that I didn’t need the operation anymore. He wouldn’t hear of it so we submitted.

My enlarged Thymus gland was removed and I healed up well from the operation. 

I kept my nocturnal experience in the back of my head. I was waiting to see if it was real and wondering if I had insisted against the operation, what would have been the outcome.

I was convalescing at home and using the prescribed medication, Mestinon. The initial prescription ran out and I had to fetch a new script. However, I kept thinking, “what if” my experience that night was real and not just an encouragement from the Lord or wishful thinking. If I did not test it, I would never know.

So my husband and I decided that we would not renew my prescription and see what happens. We put out a fleece.

I had to make some serious changes. For instance, I was always a “yes” person. It was never a matter of “if” I would do something, only a matter of “how” I would manage.

I had to learn to say “no” because I simply did not have the energy any longer. I had to learn to prioritize things according to importance and cancel or delegate whatever I could not get to.

It was very humbling.

I was getting stronger, slowly but surely. The fatigue got less and less and I managed to take on more and more. 

After four years passed, I felt physically back to myself. I was turning 38. Nearing my forties, I was wondering if there may be another child that the Lord wants to bless us with. We had two amazing boys and the doctors advised me against another pregnancy at the time of my diagnosis – but I had to be sure.

My Neurologist had moved to another city but I managed to track him down. I told him about my progress and that I hadn’t used any medication after the first dose. His response was like a voice from heaven. He was totally blown away because nobody had ever heard about anyone being healed from Myestenia Gravis. He was even more excited to hear about my healing than what he had been about discovering the disease and his words: “You haven’t had symptoms for four years?! Go for it, you’re healed!”, remains in my heart as some of the most treasured ever spoken to me.

A month later I was pregnant and nine months later I gave birth to my scruffy, funny little baby girl, Gabriella! Her name means Strong woman of God.

She is just that and will always be the final seal on my healing.

She is perfect.

What have I learned from my wonderful experience? 

I have learned that the Lord is good. I have learned that I can trust Him and that His promises stand, whether we believe or understand them or not. I learned that He sees me and He hears me. He is a loving God who gives me assurance before I ever know that I need it. I learned that He loves me more than I can ever know. It would have been enough if He healed me from the operation but I would need to take the medicine and not have another child, but He had far more to give than I could ever ask or imagine! Literally!  Not only do I have another child but He gave me my very special daughter.

During the time of my illness, we saw so many miracles. When there was no money to pay the mortgage, money appeared in our bank account and we could not track down the source to reverse it, when we had no food in the house, someone would knock on the door with a few bags of shopping. We told our maid that we needed to let her go but with four of her own kids to feed, she insisted on staying without pay so that she could help me. 

We had no medical aid at the time. I was diagnosed in the morning and in the afternoon the agent came to sell us the medical aid. They took me on without a problem and paid in full for the entire operation. We somehow managed to pay the monthly installments but a few months after the operation we fell behind. We did not see our way clear to pay it and so we went to see them to ask for mercy. The manager was so grateful that we came in instead of just ignoring their mails, that he backdated our cancellation two months so that we did not owe them anything! I have not known medical aids to do that!

It is now 25 years and I am still going strong. My husband and I look back on those years with deep gratitude for what the Lord has done in us. We now understand what James means when he says: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

‭‭James‬ ‭1‬:‭2‬-‭4‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Our God is faithful to test our faith and to grow and mature us into the image of His Son, our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

When God disciplines us He is treating us as His own sons and we know that it produces in us a harvest of righteousness!

What a God we serve!